Dangerous Dictator Dick

June 24, 2007

We here at Compatible Creatures have always much-enjoyed the literary technique of alliteration. Maybe too often. However, the device does carry a salient ring; words slip off the tongue, sometimes without passing lips and produce a fluid, distinct sound even in the mind: Alliteration is also known as “head rhyme.”

As in title to this blog. A poetic, though, sharp and ominous message is quickly created: The first two words flow hard right, headlong onto the word, Dick. A sing/song kind of Gestapo-like head rhyme: A Dick-head.

DANGEROUS DICTATOR DICK! Bold with italics: DANGEROUS DICTATOR DICK! Has a certain timbre to it, huh? A title carrying a bit of humor, but in reality, mostly a whole lot of intense anxiety and depression.

Of course, this particular Dangerous Dictator Dick is the US vice president, Dufus Dick Cheney. And he is no Charlie Chaplin. And in actuality, he is no dufus, at least in any way that can be pined on him. In the space of six or so years, the man has run his own separate fiefdom, answering to no law. He’s a despot in his own right, and probably the most dangerous threat to the more-than 200-year-old republic then any person, place or thing since the late 1700s.
Dufus Dick’s main characteristic bad-news, however, is his timeless ability to completely fuck shit up, going back decades to his one-year failure at Yale, followed by his five deferments from the draft during the Vietnam era and his riding the coat-tails of the famous into positions of power. Dufus Dick has always been secretive, keeping his cards close to the chest, allowing no one to fully comprehend his complete incompetence.

And make no mistake about it: After fucking up Gerald Ford’s presidential campaign in 1976, screwing the voters of Montana in the 1980s, destroying Halliburton’s stock in the late 1990s, Dufus Dick has finally shit-out the mother of all fuck-ups. On his shoulders rest the horror of the Middle East in the form of Iraq and soon to be Iran.

Decider George can’t create an original thought. In 2000, he asked Dufus Dick to select a vice president, but instead Dufus Dick settled on himself. Decider George’s first and maybe most-foremost horrendous decision was to Okay that solution.

Dufus Dick’s real threat is against the only true situation from US history: The Constitution. US past is horror. Manifest Destiny was really murder and greed: Take all and kill everyone who opposes, destroying cultures and any kind of animal or human life. Unless you were white and Protestant, you were not worthy of life. Just ask Native Americans.

And the only product to last through the carnage was the Constitution. Now, Dufus Dick has decided to ignore it.

Rising like a tidal wave last week were reports Dufus Dick has been ignoring an order to show how the vice president’s office handles classified information. In fact, Dufus Dick contends his office is not part of the executive branch and shouldn’t have to answer to any inquiries on how he handles anything. Decider George believes that, too. Both go against a law Decider George himself signed.

In today’s Wasington Post is an in-depth piece on Dufus Dick’s work. “Stealth is among Cheney’s most effective tools… Man-size Mosler safes, used elsewhere in government for classified secrets, store the workaday business of the office of the vice president. Even talking points for reporters are sometimes stamped “Treated As: Top Secret/SCI,” the Post story says.

It’s just in keeping in line with Dufus Dick’s entire life: Lie and lie again, and after you fuck up something, move on. And never have to answer for it, never learn.

The horror of Dangerous Dictator Dick is his ability to escape any kind of oversight or punishment. And although we wouldn’t bet the farm, there’s probably a 99.9 percent guarantee Dufus Dick will walk.

And the most grating aspect, one that leaves bile caught in the throat, is the massive damage the sonofabitch has left in his wake.

He really doesn’t give a fat-rat’s ass.

Dangerous Dictator Dick destroys da Constitution. We tried.

One thought on “Dangerous Dictator Dick

  1. banjoterror
    July 22, 2007 at 11:05 pm

    Dangerous Dictator Dick Does Dallas.

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